Raynold Tan, the 25-year-old Singaporean actor in the Filipino BL series The Day I Loved You, is new to all this — tackling his first leading role, on a Tagalog-speaking set, with a call sheet pushing 30 scenes per day. On a March day in Rizal, a province of the Philippines, he stands on a rooftop behind his co-star, 21-year-old Tommy Alejandrino. Their characters are simulating the feeling of flying; Alejandrino’s arms spread wide, reveling in its freedom, the Rose to Tan’s Jack. Tensions rise as they embrace. On screen, the music pulses, the drums kick in. Eyes, love locked. And finally, they kiss.
That scene between Tan’s lovable troublemaker Eli and Alejandrino’s ineffably positive Nikko is the culmination of their season-long romance. But for Tan in real life, it was the van ride with Alejandrino, en route to the rooftop, that made an impression. “We were searching for the right rooftop to take the shot,” Tan tells Teen Vogue over Zoom. “We looked at each other and we just said, hey, we did it. It's the last scene, we did it. We didn't say much, but it felt so real.” Even now, three months later, he can’t seem to find the right word to describe the feeling.
Set at Bright International School and directed by Easy Ferrer, The Day I Loved You is a 10-episode series that follows Nikko, the president of the book club and the dance troupe (and all-round sweetheart), and Eli, a student from Singapore who gets assigned to Nikko’s dance group as punishment for bad behavior. As the school prom draws near, Eli and Nikko grow closer, much to the concern of Nikko’s best friend Justin, played by Rabin Angeles. The series, which was filmed over an intensive four-day shoot, deals with Nikko’s journey with ALS disease amidst the romance.
What resonates about their growing intimacy is how important it is to feel seen, and how they fulfill that need in one another. Nikko pierces Eli’s disruptive, bad boy exterior, until it’s been stripped away, leaving a boy that’s craving motherly affection. Nikko’s world is so small, but his tenacious positivity makes everything feel larger-than-life.
Eli finds ways of granting Nikko’s bucket list; he journeys around the Philippines in one day, yet never leaves the house. Lying on his bed, with bubbles blowing in the air, Eli creates the illusion of deep-sea diving with a laptop and projector. “These things were small gestures and little things, but they mean a lot to Nikko,” Tan says. “These little things are what really made Nikko, Nikko.”
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In real life, Alejandrino’s bucket list includes going to outer space. Tan’s list features skydiving in New Zealand (“Let’s go,” Alejandrino chimes in). They pitch their next project, in which Alejandrino plays a superhero in space and Tan is a supervillain. “You’re gonna have to fight me bro,” Tan laughs. He calls it The Day I Hated You.
Vibrant animations sweeten the magic of Nikko's outlook on life (“He has this introverted nature to him, so I feel like his inner world is much richer,” Alejandrino says), flashing imagery that has conjured comparisons to the visual style of Alice Oseman’s Heartstopper, which was a source of inspiration for the creative team. “They had some stills from Heartstopper as references and pegs for how they wanted it to feel,” Alejandrino says. “I’m actually really glad that people embraced it and that it reminded them a lot of Heartstopper instead of seeing it like a copy.”
That light, giddy treatment contends with the reality of Nikko’s life with ALS. “It opens us up to this part of him, which validates his No Fear List. Nikko’s a character with a lot of deep-seated fears,” Alejandrino says. “He's very attentive to the simple touch or the simple way his crush looks back at him, and with how everybody demeans him, and the way he is as a person, being bullied and all, he's the type of person who really doesn't believe that somebody like Eli would fall in love with him.” Still though, Nikko strives forward, making the prom the best it can be, studying to the top of his class — always positive, relentlessly so. “He's going to do his best to feel his worth, aside from knowing deep down, he's unlovable.”
Filming the series was a whole new world for Tan. “I was an alien,” he says. “But everyone treated me like their own.” He doesn’t speak Tagalog, so every member of the cast and crew made an effort to speak English around him, even those for whom English wasn’t a strong suit. “I felt so much more comfortable because you were there,” Tan tells Alejandrino, whose first language is English, having learned Tagalog at age 13. Set life was upbeat, and naturally, the cast taught Tan curse words in Tagalog. “It was a pleasant surprise and reminder that people are nice. The world is nice.”
Playing a character like Nikko pushed Alejandrino into a vulnerable place. “The line between me and Nikko is very thin,” he says. Especially now, with the full series open to fan reception. “It was the first time I felt interpreted or perceived by people in a very different light from how I used to be perceived, given my previous projects.” Alejandrino knew what kind of BL coupling people would want (“More socially acceptable… Masculine with another masculine guy”), and indeed some fans expressed interest in Eli ending up with Justin, but Alejandrino enjoyed the different responses Nikko’s character elicited.
Witnessing Alejandrino as the cameras rolled was a masterclass in acting for Tan. “Everything Tommy did was deliberate,” Tan says. “It felt so natural, it felt real, in the moment.” When he asked Alejandrino for tips, he merely replied “You gotta feel it, man,” Tan laughs reenacting it. “I was like, what do you mean I gotta feel it? Dude, give me something more concrete!”
The Day I Loved You follows in the footsteps of other BL series from the Philippines such as our Best BL Dramas of 2021 picks, Gameboys and Stuck on You, all broadcasting kilig to the masses. But this strand of content is vital. Alejandrino’s industry mate and star of Gaya Sa Pelikula, Paolo Pangilinan, put it like this to Teen Vogue last year: “In all spheres of life — art, education, media and politics — especially those that are visible, what we put out there should be reflective of what is also behind the lens.”
It speaks to what piqued Alejandrino’s interest in the project. He calls it “unearthing what’s so secret.” The realities we know to be true yet often relegate to the periphery. The ways of life that we don’t understand — is it because we can’t, or because we don’t want to? Queer love doesn’t exist in the fringes, it permeates the lives closest to us, it is alive and everywhere. Acting is about “having one minute of that one scene where you can show and reveal to everybody the secret that you know,” Alejandrino says. “You're opening this door that nobody wants to open up, but you know that everybody knows it exists.”
He has found that this BL, and Nikko’s story within it, is an opportunity to bridge audiences to the truths they shy away from. It’s like taking their hand, guiding them, telling them “I have something in me,” Alejandrino continues. “It's real. And I want you to see it, I want you to look at it, and I want you to listen. Maybe you'll see the human in it. It's probably not such a big monster to be feared. It's probably the opposite.” This all comes as queer rights advocates in the Philippines await the future of the SOGIESC bill, which would prohibit discrimination and harassment on the basis of sexual orientation, gender identity, gender expression, and sex characteristics.
Tan accepted his BL role after David Eung Hao, his industry mate who starred in the Singaporean BL Summerdaze, encouraged him to join the cast. But it was also a chance to spread a message of acceptance. “Right now, at least in Singapore, the queer community is still facing a lot of roadblocks,” Tan says. Last November, Singapore decriminalized gay sex, but remains welded to their constitution’s definition of marriage. “I think the general perception from the public, it’s not where it should be yet.” Tan and Alejandrino both acknowledge the progression in LGBTQIA+ rights, but concede there is much further to go.
Reaching the end of our interview, having heard the testimony of these rising stars, I suggest the word that has evaded them. One word to explain the way they felt on that day in Rizal. “You know how you climb out of a cave,” Alejandrino says, “And then you finally breathe fresh air. You get to the mouth of the cave from the darkest, deepest parts. That’s what that felt like when we finished all four days of non-stop shooting.” Euphoria.
Tan recalls losing his sense of purpose as he boarded a plane back to Singapore, greeted by his college thesis deadline. Saying goodbye to the Philippines left him with post-show blues (“It wasn't just blue, it was like navy blue. Dark, dark blue”), but also immense pride. “It was nothing like I ever felt before,” he says. “It was the first time I felt I had actual bonds and connections with my co-actors and crew.” (A month after our interview, Tan has welcomed Alejandrino and Angeles to Singapore, ahead of an anticipated second season).
Those on-set antics have become core memories. “We all had one common goal,” Alejandrino says. “Keep every second tethered to the heart of the story.” No one but Tan and Alejandrino will ever know how it felt in that moment to stand on the rooftop, ready to soar.
The Day I Loved You is streaming now on YouTube.
