Alicia Crowder’s character Diana is the hero of Tell Me Lies season 3, episode 4. We’ve seen Diana masterfully plot her escape from the years-long toxic relationship she had with Stephen (Jackson White); embark on a potentially healthy love story with Pippa (Sonia Mena); and, in the most recent episode, make a powerful statement about why abortion access is so vital—and why, if you make that choice, it’s not anyone’s business but your own.
In episode 4, Diana is a woman on a mission to achieve her law school dreams, and maybe even get some space from an abusive friend group. This mission could have been interrupted by the realization that she’s pregnant, the result of when she and Stephen got back together last season. Diana reveals the news to frenemy Molly (Katherine Hughes), sharing matter-of-factly that she’s scheduled an abortion. (Diana's first iconic line of the episode? “Being a woman is a prison.”)
Molly quickly spreads the gossip to her situationship Evan (Branden Cook), who takes it to Stephen and Wrigley (Spencer House) in the middle of a crowded dining hall. Word gets around fast, and when Diana finds out how, she correctly asserts, “God, you guys all suck.”
Crowder tells Teen Vogue that playing Diana this season “was really fun, because I think she's a little bit less buttoned-up and this perfect, little package,” she says. “I think that she starts being honest, but hopefully in a way that feels helpful.”
The most poignant moment in season 3's episode 4 comes when Stephen confronts Diana, going to her dorm room unannounced to yell at and patronize her (even more wildly, he attempts to manipulate her relationship with her dad for his benefit). “I’m hearing that you already scheduled an abortion…. You don’t think I have a right to be f*cking consulted?” Stephen asks. Diana responds immediately: “No, I don’t.” He tries to get her to discuss the decision further, a.k.a., to get her to do what he wants, but Diana holds firm. “There’s no decision," she tells him, "it’s decided.”
She then delivers the final blow: “You can’t control me anymore. Try with someone else.” While the line is heightened in the context of the various abuses these characters inflict on each other, it’s also a moment of empowerment and honesty for Diana. It's a victory, even just briefly. Stephen is enraged, powerless, and will surely seek revenge, but for a few minutes, we are allowed to see a world for these characters that doesn’t involve appeasing the violent, manipulative men in their lives.
The way Diana’s choice to have an abortion is shown to be an obvious decision feels crucial for how abortion is represented in pop culture, especially in a time when abortion access is still very much under attack in parts of the US after Roe v. Wade was overturned in 2022, allowing states to restrict abortion access.
It reminded me of how Sex Education presented Maeve’s abortion storyline: It is a fact of her life, a choice she makes on her own terms, for her own reasons. The same is true for Diana. The decision does not define her forever, and the abortion itself is not a massive trauma for her, even if it brings up traumatic feelings about her history with Stephen. Her future, away from any potential ties to her emotionally abusive ex, is hers alone.
Crowder says the choice felt wholly “true” to who Diana is: “I think that if she had debated about what to do, that wouldn't have been true to her character, because she's so focused on her future and her education and her career. That is what is important to her and what should be important to her. She's a senior in college. She's, what, 22 years old?”
Crowder continues, “It's okay to make that choice, but it definitely affects her life. It affects her relationships. It affects her relationship, not her relationship with Steven, but it brings back all of this ugliness and sadness that she thought that she had left in the past.”
It’s interesting to see how the abortion arc illuminates each character’s intrinsic way of seeing the world. At the dining hall, Stephen and Evan are aligned in their shared idea that Diana owes Stephen the truth about a pregnancy, and thus hold some entitlement over the bodies and choices of others.
Wrigley, meanwhile, is the lone defender of Diana’s privacy. “I don’t think you should be telling Stephen this. Isn’t this Diana’s private business?” Wrigley asks. When Stephen says he deserves to be consulted about his “kid,” Wrigley is skeptical: “Kid? It’s just a clump of cells at this point.… What would she consult you about? I don’t think she needs your permission. It’s kinda up to her…. Maybe we’re not supposed to have an opinion about this.”
And that feels, ultimately, like the most important takeaway from this episode with regard to Diana’s story. The decisions you make about your health are no one’s business but your own.
