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Asking the right questions to get to know someone is harder than it sounds. Whether it’s a new classmate, a friend of a friend, someone you’re crushing on, or your best friend’s sibling, it’s always nice to have a vault of “get to know you” questions on hand.
Are you capable of surviving conversational lulls without them? We promise you that you are, and we could all stand to get comfier with “awkward” silence anyway. But we also don’t blame you if meeting someone for the first time — say, while on a first date with them — isn’t when you want to start suddenly embracing silence. (Our social anxiety flares up at the thought, honestly!)
There’s nothing wrong with keeping on file some backup questions to ask someone you just met. Even if the conversation is going well already, asking thoughtful questions is a great way to show real interest and more meaningfully connect. That goes for close friends and significant others, too. Whether it’s your best friend since grade school or your longtime girlfriend, getting older and gaining life experiences means our perspective and opinions are always evolving. To keep close, authentic relationships, questions to ask to get to know someone are always a good idea — because we should never assume we already know all there is to know about a person!
All this talk about talking put you in the mood to gab? We’ll share some pointers for skipping small talk and asking good “get to know you” questions below, from body language cues to tips for keeping the convo flowing freely. Then, we’ll break down our favorite questions to ask by vibe — from deep talks to fun banter — and how long you’ve known the person, whether you’re chatting for the first time or looking for questions to get to know someone better who’s already in your life. Regardless of the vibe or audience, though, we’ve made sure these are all genuinely interesting topics to discuss. No “so, what do you think of this weather?” talk to be found here!
In this article:
- How to Ask Good “Get to Know You” Questions
- Questions to Ask Someone You Just Met
- Personal Questions to Get to Know Someone Better
- Deep Questions to Ask Someone (New or Old)
- Fun “Get to Know You” Questions
- Funny Questions to Ask Just For Laughs
How to Ask Good “Get to Know You” Questions
When asking questions to get to know someone, you don’t want it to feel like a formal interview. So, skip the rapid-fire checklist and start with curiosity, asking open-ended questions that can’t be answered with just “yes” or “no.” (“What’s your dream vacation?” will go a lot further than “Do you like traveling?”) It’s less about collecting facts and more about making the other person feel seen and heard.
As you chat, pay attention to their body language and tone. If they light up talking about their favorite childhood movie, follow that thread instead of jumping to your next question. The most memorable conversations happen when you build on what someone just shared — it shows you’re listening and not just waiting for your turn to talk. And if they seem uncomfortable or give short answers, don’t force it! Sometimes the best connection comes from giving someone space to warm up.
Finally, keep the balance. The goal isn’t to pepper people with questions in the style of a reality TV confessional. Share your own stories, opinions, and “me too” moments along the way, staying mindful of how quickly you turn the conversation back to yourself. If the person you’re chatting with can barely finish answering a question before you’ve taken over the mic, it’ll seem like you’re only asking “get to know you” questions as a means to talk about yourself. Don’t let your desire to relate be what makes you unintentionally steamroll the other person!
Sprinkle in some follow-up questions, and keep your sharing in the spirit of connection. Some back-and-forth will make things feel like a true conversation instead of an interrogation, giving you both a chance to open up naturally. Before you know it, you’ll have skipped right past the small talk and into the good stuff — like our picks for the best “get to know you” questions below.
Questions to Ask Someone You Just Met
Chatting up someone new? Our tip: Nix “what are you studying?” or “what do you do for a living?” They’re clichés, and they rarely make for memorable conversation. Let that info come out naturally mid-chat instead, leading off with a more engaging “get to know you” question like the options below.
- Did you grow up around here, or somewhere completely different?
- What brought you to this city?
- (Observation about your city or campus.) Have you noticed that, too?
- What’s been the highlight of your week so far?
- Have you discovered any cool spots in this neighborhood?
- Do you have a go-to coffee or lunch spot?
- What kind of music have you been into lately?
- What’s your favorite sport to watch?
- What’s the best book you’ve read recently?
- Do you have any pets?
- Have you discovered any great TV shows or podcasts recently?
- Are you more of a morning person or a night owl?
- Do you like trying new foods, or do you stick to your favorites?
- What’s the last thing you watched that made you laugh out loud?
- Do you enjoy going to live events, like concerts or theater?
- Have you picked up any hobbies recently?
- What’s your favorite way to spend a weekend?
- Do you enjoy traveling, or do you prefer staying local?
- What’s one thing you’ve been meaning to try but haven’t yet?
- If someone was visiting for the first time, what’s one thing you’d tell them to do?
- What’s your favorite thing you’ve done so far this month?
- What’s the best thing you’ve done on a whim?
- Do you have a favorite view in the city?
- What’s one skill you’ve been wanting to learn?
- What’s something you’re looking forward to right now?
- What’s your favorite street or neighborhood to wander around?
- What’s something you think this city/place does better than anywhere else?
- Is there anything you cook or bake really, really well?
- What’s a meal you’ve had here that you keep thinking about?
- Have you found it easy or challenging to meet new people here?
- What do you think the best museum nearby is?
- What do you think the best outdoor spot nearby is?
- Where do you go to buy (insert thing) around here?
- This food/place/party is reminding me of XYZ. Have you been?
- You seem like you might like (insert activity). Am I wrong?
Personal Questions to Get to Know Someone Better
So, you’ve met the person you’re chatting with a few times now, and you’re hoping to move past the casual-acquaintance stage. No sweat! Just try on for size one of the following questions to ask people to get to know them better.
- What three words would you use to describe yourself?
- What’s your favorite nickname someone has given you and how did you get it?
- Do you believe in astrology? Why or why not?
- Where is one place you’ve always dreamed of going?
- If money were no object, what’s the first thing you would buy?
- Does your family have any big traditions?
- Do you have any “characters” in your family?
- If you started a business, what would it be?
- Do you enjoy being somewhere no one else knows you?
- Where do you go for fresh inspiration?
- What do you wish you did more of?
- If you had the opportunity to redesign society, what would you change?
- What impresses you the most?
- What brings you the most joy?
- What’s something that makes you feel overwhelmed?
- Do you often listen to your intuition?
- Do you like small talk?
- What’s the best gift you’ve ever received?
- What’s more important in life: excitement or stability?
- Do you collect anything?
- What’s something you’ve done recently for the first time?
- What’s the first concert you ever went to?
- Do you have a favorite way to celebrate small wins?
- Do you enjoy taking the scenic route?
- What’s one tradition you’ve made for yourself as an adult?
- If you could instantly master any skill, what would it be?
- What’s your go-to way to relax after a long day?
- Is there a book or movie that’s had a big impact on you?
- Do you prefer planning things out or being spontaneous?
- What’s your go-to comfort meal?
- What’s one errand or task you actually enjoy doing?
- Do you like going to the same vacation spot or somewhere new each time?
- What’s your favorite holiday or time of year?
- Do you like road trips?
- Have you ever kept a hobby going for years?
Deep Questions to Ask Someone (New or Old)
If small talk isn’t your thing, chances are you’re dying to get to the truly deep questions. There’s no rule saying you have to know someone for a certain amount of time before going deep; just make sure you’re paying attention to comfort cues and not forcing vulnerability on anyone! For a dash of levity, you can always mix in a fun “get to know you” question, too.
- What is something that makes you feel unstoppable?
- What is the biggest compliment you can give someone?
- Would you call yourself brave?
- When do you feel the safest?
- What’s your favorite childhood memory?
- What’s your biggest life regret so far?
- What are you most grateful for in life?
- What’s something you’re really bad at?
- What’s a small act of kindness someone did for you that you’ll never forget?
- What do you look for when finding new friends?
- Are you a good gift giver?
- Do you think you’re a friendly person?
- Who do you admire most and why?
- Have you ever had a spiritual experience?
- What’s the quickest way someone can lose your trust?
- Is it easy for you to accept help from people?
- Do you live by any particular mantra?
- How would you spend your last day on earth?
- Do you consider yourself introspective?
- What is your number one goal in life?
- How do you hope people describe you?
- Have you ever been in love?
- Do you want your own family someday?
- How do you define beauty in another person?
- Do you think dreams have deeper meanings?
- Do you often give people second chances?
- What do you think happens to us after death?
- What do you think makes someone a good person?
- Have you ever experienced deja vu?
- What is something that gives you hope?
- What is something that makes you really angry?
- Do you have a biggest fear?
- How do you express your love for someone?
- What does friendship mean to you?
- What is something you consider too serious to joke about?
- What does spirituality mean to you?
- Have you ever had an epiphany?
- Have you ever told a lie that you regretted?
- What are you most proud of?
- What’s your least favorite emotion?
- What’s your least favorite part about being you?
- How do you react to anger from others?
- What’s a dealbreaker for you in a relationship?
- What do you think it means to be healthy?
- What do you love most about life?
- Do you tend to trust people easily?
- What is something you have never truly wrapped your head around?
- Are you proud of yourself?
- What do you consider your core values?
- Do you think you have a true calling?
- Do you hold grudges or do you let go of things easily?
- What’s something that makes you envious?
- Do you consider yourself a people pleaser?
- What’s the toughest conversation you’ve ever had to have?
- What’s your biggest insecurity?
- What is one thing you think most people have and never appreciate enough?
- How has your personality changed since you were a kid, if it has?
Fun “Get to Know You” Questions
Now that you’ve gotten all the talk about hopes and dreams out of the way, it’s time to get to the truly serious questions to get to know someone, like: ranch on pizza, always or no way? Expect some enthusiastic debates to come of the queries below.
- Describe your perfect day.
- What’s the best cereal?
- What’s a movie you could watch every day?
- Do you have a favorite memory?
- What’s your dream career?
- Which unconventional animal do you wish you could have as a pet?
- Would you rather spend the day at an art museum or on a backcountry trail?
- What is one super-specific museum you would visit?
- What is the worst song, in your opinion?
- If you could get rid of any genre of music, which would it be?
- Would you rather have the ability to fly or the ability to teleport?
- What is your claim to fame?
- What is a skill you’ve always wanted to learn?
- Do you have a favorite TV show?
- What is your all-time favorite food?
- What do you daydream about?
- Do you have a morning routine?
- What’s the most relaxing part of your day?
- What are you most excited about for the future?
- What do you think the ultimate theme party would be?
- What’s on the top of your bucket list?
- What do you think the worst job out there is?
- If you have the opportunity to know the future, would you want to know?
- Where is the most beautiful place you have ever seen in person?
- Where is the fanciest place you’ve ever been?
- What’s your favorite kind of weather?
- Chappell Roan or Sabrina Carpenter?
- Do you like cities or remote places better?
- Would you survive a zombie apocalypse?
- Do you have a favorite type of exercise?
- Which phone app do you use the most?
- Do you prefer cooking dinner or going out?
- Do you believe in ghosts?
- Are you good at solving puzzles?
- Do you sing in the shower?
- Are you double jointed in any way?
- What’s the first thing you do in the morning?
Funny Questions to Ask Just for Laughs
Even if laughs are your aim with these “get to know you” funny questions, you’d be surprised what all you might learn about each other in the process. Let the banter begin!
- If you could jump into a pool of anything, what would it be full of?
- What’s the best wif-fi name you’ve seen?
- What do you think the worst smell is?
- Why are pizzas usually round?
- What part of the driver’s test are you most likely to fail?
- Do you talk to yourself?
- Are you still scared of monsters?
- What’s the funniest moment you’ve ever shared with a stranger?
- What’s the weirdest fact you know?
- When was the last time you made a prank call?
- Have you ever fallen asleep in class?
- If you could erase one color from existence, which one would it be?
- Who is your most embarrassing celebrity crush?
- What’s the most creative insult you can think of right now?
- What is the most annoying musical instrument?
- What is the weirdest thing in your home?
- What’s the worst name you could give a pet?
- What do you think people will be nostalgic for in 500 years?
- Who would you elect the president of the internet?
- Who are two people you would love to see box each other?
- What’s the weirdest gift you’ve given?
- Who is the biggest drama queen in your family?
- What’s the worst pick-up line?
- What would be the funniest superpower?
- Would you choose uncontrollable farting over uncontrollable hiccuping?
- Do you think dad jokes are played out?
- Which celebrity would you choose as a mentor?
- What dessert would you compare your best friend to?
- What’s the wildest online purchase you’ve ever made?
- If different fruits could talk, which would sound the funniest?
- Is a burger a sandwich?
- You have to choose one: eyelashes or eyebrows?
- If your phone could talk, what’s the most embarrassing thing it would reveal about you?
- If raindrops weren’t a thing, what would you want to fall from the sky?
- What’s the silliest way you’ve ever gotten an injury?
- What do you think your pet’s voice would sound like if they could talk?
- What’s the worst bio you’ve ever seen on a dating app?
Made it through our full lineup of “get to know you” questions? Keep the conversation going with:
